Breathe me in
by bibi 13ca
Summary: The M-rated one-shot I promised from the bathroom scene where Elena drinks from Damon. I hope you'll enjoy!


**N: So, finally, the promised one-shot is here. Last episode (04x04) kind of hit me and took my inspiration away just as I was about to finish this. I am sorry of the ending is not the best.**

**Thank you Morgan (morvamp) for looking over this, the last lines are there due to your encouragement.**

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**Breathe me in, drink me down and eat me up**

I closed the bathroom door behind me and turned around to face her. Just like I predicted, she had that sort of expression on her face that let me know she was about to ask me what I'm doing. Honestly, I had no idea what I was actually doing. Bah, nothing new under the sun, I never have a clue what I was doing when it comes to her; never did. It's like for a split second I lose my mind and I'm unable to think. When I finally put myself together is usually too late, I am in too deep. Predictably enough she literally asked me what am doing. Her eyes opened wide as I raised my hand to my mouth and bite into the palm of my hand. There was a new sort of sparkle in her brown irises. I guess a part of it had to do with the fact that she's no longer human.

Blood started pouring from my self-inflicted wound and I noticed Elena lick her lips. Even if I was pretty sure the gesture was involuntary, something inside me trembled in response to it. There was a hunger rising from within myself, but not just the regular kind of hunger, the kind that can drive a person mad.

"You need fresh blood from the vein, Elena. Let's hope this will do the trick," I offered her my bleeding hand. "Just don't tell Stefan," I whispered. A part of me hoped she didn't hear me, because I didn't want her to pull away. A part of me also hoped she heard me and she just didn't care that she was doing something Stefan won't approve of. Of course now that she's a vampire there was like, no chance in hell she didn't hear me. She pulled back just a few inches, fixating me with that intense stare that does all sorts of wicked things to me.

"Why not?" she asked softly. As always, she does her duty as the good person she still is - despite her being part of the dead-ish population of Mystic Falls. She is trying to fight her own wishes and desires to not hurt the people she cares about, but what else is new? I already knew she was starving and knew she wanted nothing more than to deepen her teeth into my flesh and drink me down. The question was: would she do what she wanted now that she was a vampire? It seemed like the time to take action, the perfect opportunity to let loose at least for a few minutes.

I realized her decision was made the moment her hand touched my arm. The simple fact that she reached for me had been a good sign. She licked her lips – just like before – and for some reason I did the same. The anticipation was killing me – in a deader way than I already was. Like a good girl, she waited for my answer even if the answer wouldn't matter and we both knew it.

"Because blood sharing is kind of…personal," I finally answered. Our eyes met and we said everything we were not able to speak out loud. We already were more personal with one another than we should've been. Those boundaries had long been crossed.

She was breathing heavily and the rhythm of her chest going up and down was pushing me closer to the edge of breaking, say 'the hell with everything' and take everything I wanted. She looked at the wound that was slowly closing in the palm of my hand, then back at me. I nodded subtly and that was enough for her. She curled her long fingers around my hand, taking the source of nourishment closer to her mouth.

At the feeling of her fangs piercing further into my skin, I let out a breath. I could feel every millimetre of her deadly canines penetrating my skin deeper and deeper. Her eyes rolled in the back of her head as they turned from golden brown to dark brown and finally black. She was no longer a girl, she was no longer human; she was now a predator. Her need for me was overwhelming and I liked to think it wasn't just the blood and the hunger for blood, but the hunger for me. Soft moans and growls were coming from deep inside her throat and they sounded so good I could feel myself getting hard. Without even realizing, I started breathing just as heavily as her. I closed my eyes, allowing myself to enjoy the sensation as she drank me down, gulp by gulp. The feeling took over me; in a way it was like I had some sort of power over her which was new to me, I usually felt powerless when it came to this girl. She was squeezing my fingers and pulling my arm, sinking her teeth even deeper into my flesh like she was trying to get more of me, like no matter how much she'll have, it won't be enough until I'm all inside of her. The thought made my dick twitch and like she read my thoughts, she pushed me against the wall.

For the first time since I've known her, I let go of everything else and all that mattered was her. Not my brother, not her friends and definitely not what others thought, just us. She was doing the same, I could tell, all there was for her in that moment was me. I could get use to that feeling, the feeling of being the only thing worth living for, for once. There was so much passion in the way she was holding on to me, I thought we were both going to disappear into each other.

I finally let go, following her over the involuntary path to self-destruction. We were breathing and moaning in unison and I just knew that the sound would haunt me for eternity. Who was I kidding, she was _it_ for me; she was the only constant thought in my mind and no matter what I will never be able to stay away from her as long as she needed me. I was weak when it came to her and she knew it, sometimes she took advantage of it, but I didn't mind. That was the part of her that remind me of why I fell in love with Katherine so many years ago. Passion and fire were the things that were driving her in those moments and I loved her like that…_free_.

She was pushing, and pulling and squirming, rubbing herself against me and I wondered – not for the first time – how much I could take before exploding. She growled loudly and I thought that was what pulled her out of the loop we were both stuck in. She pulled back looking at me like the last thing she wanted was to pull away. Her face was all vamped-out, but she had never looked more beautiful than right then in that erotic, animalist, wild state she was in. Her lips parted a little, revealing her immaculate identical fangs, her hands reached the collar of my shirt and before I realized what was happening, her teeth were cutting into the sensitive flesh of my neck. The ease with which she found the vein surprised her as much as it surprised me. We both knew, somehow we knew, she was meant for that.

Her left hand curled around my neck – as if she needed for even a second to hold me in place – and her right hand caressed my cheek, her fingers tangling in my hair. As I pushed her closer, I didn't even realize until much later that my hand slipped underneath her t-shirt. It became impossible for me to make out where she finished and where I started, the connection ran way too deep for us to separate ourselves from one another.

When she pulled back her eyes were wild and I had no idea if she would eat me, slap me or fuck me. She licked the left-over blood from her lips and before I had time to gather my thoughts her lips attacked mine. That was the moment I realized my hand was already touching her bare skin and I started moving my hand slowly up and down her back. I could hear bells in my head as she was kissing the Holy Spirit out of me. Her hands were all over me and a few seconds later I heard a tearing sound, followed by the sound of five little buttons hitting the floor in different places around the tiny bathroom.

"Arrrgghh," she growled as she pulled back to look at me. "I can't," she said and I couldn't say I wasn't expecting that, but I was definitely not expecting what followed.

"I can't stop thinking about you. This… this desire, it's like electricity in my body," she looked at me from head to toe like she was inspecting me. I could feel her desire growing with every passing second. I knew what it meant, knew how overwhelming feelings could become, especially as a vampire, but I thought _Miss Denial_ would be the one to beat the odds. A big part of me was still expecting her to pull back and start yelling 'Oh my God' and 'what have we done, this was a mistake' and so on.

There was still some – almost dry – blood on my right shoulder and without even blinking, she bent over and licked it off. Her smooth tongue went in circles on my skin, making me burn from the inside out. I wondered if she had a clue what she was doing to me. Probably not; she was just responding to her urges, give into what she desired. It was beautiful to watch and to feel. I had always known she was full of passion and fire, but I never thought she would end up revealing that passionate, dominant and animalistic side with me in a tiny bathroom of Mystic Grill as soon as she turned into a vampire. The tip of her tongue pushed firmly against my flesh and slid upwards all the way to my ear. She let out another growl right before locking her lips with mine. I could taste my own blood on her lips, the feeling was euphoric. All the blood in my veins traveled to the middle area of my body. That was not a good sign. If she lost control and I lost control, there was no telling how far we'd take it.

"Elena, wait...wait," I bumbled between heavy breaths, but she was still far from putting an end to it; whatever 'it' was. I stuck my finger between our lips to keep them separate as I took in a few deep breaths, not because I needed them, but because I had to in order to stay away from her tempting mouth. I knew that if she started kissing me that way again I wouldn't be able to stop.

"Ah," she moaned and I almost started kissing her again, that's how good she sounded. And she looked even better. It seemed that the pale neon light was actually complimenting her complexion, making her glow. Her cheeks were slightly flushed and her lips were sore and red. She had never looked more beautiful and it was hard for me to keep away, it took all my self-control to not rip her clothes off and start kissing her until someday next month, on next century.

"Elena, you don't want to do this," I whispered.

"Oh you have no idea how much I actually want to do this," she protested and I let out a deep sigh. She wouldn't understand; words like that were what got people into all sorts of trouble. Didn't she know that I was about to hold on to each and every word she spoke?

"You're not thinking straight, your emo –"

"If," she posed for effect. "I hear the words 'your emotions are heightened' on more time, I swear I'll go on a killing spree!" she shouted between her teeth. "Really, all that everyone's been telling me lately is that my emotions are heightened. Well, newsflash, I know that because I feel them."

"Well, what do you feel, Elena?" I asked, pushing her buttons like I always do, because someone had to push her. I was hoping that it would work, that she'd tell me what she really felt. I knew her too well and I knew that when hard times were ahead, when her feelings went against what everyone called 'moral', she supressed them.

"How I feel? I feel like I'm walking on eggshells and any moment they might break and I'll fall. I am hungry almost all the time and I am afraid that if I feed on a human I might like it, so much that I won't be able to stop. My skin feels like I'm on fire, like I'm trapped inside someone else's body and I can't get out. And now…" she stopped and for a moment I thought she wouldn't go on. But when I heard her talk, I had to shake my head and pay attention to make sure I wasn't just imagining it happen. "Right now," she started softly, "I feel like I might fall apart if I don't touch you, hit you, bite you, kiss you; hell it's so much that I don't even know what I want to do to you. I have to," she cupped my face, "do something about it," she went on as she was caressing my face. The gentleness in her touch was going in contrast with the roughness of her voice and the storm of her emotions. Hearing her talk like that was making my damned heart beat faster – and it shouldn't beat at all!

"You'll be fine, Elena. You just have to take it one thing at the time," I mumbled, hoping she'd believe me.

"I am," she said and went on, kissing my jaw line, my cheeks and finally her lips closed over mine. Her tongue started pushing in and out, twining around my own. She took control over my mouth and she was not shy about it. Her fingers got a grip of my hair and started pulling to change the position of my head. It was crazy the way she was kissing me. I thought she might swallow me whole if she kept going at it the way she was. But I knew how she felt. I knew how she felt so well, because the same desire was rushing thought me.

Her hands slid on my shoulders, underneath my shirt, pushing the clothing off. "Not fair," I muttered and immediately started working on evening the score. I pulled her t-shirt over her head. She was wearing a simple black bra, but it made her breasts look perfect and I knew I would have a blast taking that bra off no matter how great it looked on her.

"I need to…" she didn't finish her sentence, but I knew what she needed as soon as I heard my belt come undone. Her hands were so eagerly moving on my body, it was as I could feel - her need.

"Elena," I gasped her name as her slightly cold fingers curled around my erection. It was like her hand was made to fit around it, like a glove that's made to perfectly fit around each finger. Shyly at first, she started stroking me up and down in a slow, maddening pace. I could feel her fingers sliding with ease as a drop of pre-cum moistened the tip. The sounds she made were echoing in my head and vibrating in my heart. She's been in control way too long and to gain the upper hand, I turned us around, pushing her against the door. In the same time, I ripped off her bra. She cursed under her breath as I started spreading kisses all over her upper body. I concentrate on each breast equally, enjoying the fact that she was arching her back against the surface, pushing her chest forward.

I took my time opening the tiny zipper of her jeans, because I was afraid that it I would've done it any faster, I would've ripped it apart. As I pulled off her jeans, one leg at the time, she started passing her fingertips over my shoulders, my upper arms and neck. "Does it feel the same for you too?" she asked. I finished taking her pants off, placed them on the sink and looked at her.

"What?" I asked, a bit lost.

"When I touch you, do you feel it everywhere, like it's enveloping you?"

"Yes," I placed the tip of my pointer finger on her neck, in the place I knew her carotid artery was passing. I let my finger slide on her smooth neck, her collarbone, her shoulder, the outline of her breast; she moaned and closed her eyes. "I do," I went on as my finger reached her flat abdomen. Her breath started coming out in short gasps and her head started moving from left to right on the wooden door. She raised her hands above her head, like she was offering herself to me. The image of a siren, her black thong, the only clothing she had on, her hair cascading over her bare flesh, pinned against the flat surface…she was a vision that was making my blood boil. "All you have to do is look at me in that particular way you sometimes do and I feel you in every fiber of my body, Elena."

"When I think about you, it's like I get dizzy," she said and I smirked at her.

"When I think of you, I feel an arrow in my chest. It's made out of wood and is close enough to hurt like hell, but not close enough to kill me just yet," I replied

"That happens to me when I look at Stefan, knowing I am thinking about you," she said sadly and I just bit my lip not to say anything. I wanted to ask her 'why?' I just wanted to know why she would put herself through it. I was afraid that asking those kinds of questions would just push her away and in that moment I needed her too much.

"You look so perfect," I started as I curled my hand around her thin waist. I pulled her closer and her arms went around my neck immediately. For a few minutes we just looked at each other. "I just want you to know it makes no difference to me whatever you are human or vampire." She nodded softly.

"I know," she said. "Now please just kiss me." But I didn't get to kiss her, she kissed me first. Taking advantage of her new found strength, she pushed me on the opposite wall and started kissing me. At the same time, she pushed my pants down with her foot. A minute later I had her on the edge of the sink, her long legs wrapped around my hips. "Damon," she whimpered. "Damon…Damon," this time close to my ear and the way she was saying my name just made me stop and look at her.

"What?"

"I want you," she admitted softly.

"Do you?"

"Yes, please…" hearing her beg got the best of me. I was sure I just pushed her panties aside, but when I took another look, I had actually ripped them apart. "Don't, just keep touching me," she protested seeing that I'd stopped. I did as she asked and kept touching her, caressing her skin, massaging her full breasts and pulling her closer to me. When I finally buried myself inside her, the growl that came out of her throat reminded me of a wild animal. I kept moving, faster and faster, enjoying the fact that the woman in my arms was no longer breakable.

"Bite me!" she moaned against me ear.

"What?"

"I want to feel what you felt when I drank from you," she reasoned.

"Elena, you are still weak."

"I'll drink from you too."

"You don't know what you're asking. It's way too – "

"Personal?" she asked incredulously. "Damon, you're inside of me, I can feel you in every cell of my body, inside and outside, I don't think it gets more personal than that."

"You have a point. Just promise me you'll take my wrist as soon as you feel lightheaded."

"I promise," she said with a smile, like we just agreed to exchange numbers, not blood.

She pulled her hair aside, revealing her silky neckline. I bent over a bit more and started kissing the spot until I could feel her blood boil in her veins. Her nails were piercing the skin on my back in the same time as my fangs cut into the skin of her neck. Once I started drinking her, everything became a blur. She tasted better than the best bourbon, better than the most perfectly aged wine. There was no real comparison to be made. I was vaguely aware of her hand grabbing mine and then I felt a slight pain as she bit into my wrist. There are really no words to explain how it felt. It didn't just feel like a part of her belonged to me. No, she gave herself over to me, all of her. Everything she was, everything she's been, belonged to me. There were no secrets, I could feel her love for me, I could feel her desire and her fear. Every feeling she had, was going through me as if it were my own.

We both came undone at the same time and once the effect of the blood-shearing wore off, we started dressing.

"How do you do it?" she asked as I was trying to arrange my shirt in a way that would not reveal the fact that it was missing all of its buttons.

"How do I do what?"

"Having all these feelings inside and not…act on them?"

"I ignore them, hoping that one day you'll make the choice and we can both stop."

"I did," she whispered. "I did make a choice, I just don't know if it's the right one anymore."

Yes she did, she chose my brother, and yet, there she was…with me. What was I doing? What was _she_ doing? "I can't answer that question for you Elena…"

"Do you still feel it? I can still feel you."

"I know."

"When would it go away?"

"Never. Not as long as you keep feeling the way you do. I can pretend this didn't happen if that's what you want me to do, but I doubt you'd be able to," I unlocked the door, but before pushing it opened, I turned around to face her. "And do us all a favor, next time you make a choice, take your feelings into consideration not the circumstances," I said and she just stood there, staring at me as I got out of the bathroom and closed the door behind me.

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**N: I put some work into this and stumbled a bit, but finally I got it out, for me DE will always end up with each other even if they are apart.**

**Please don't forget to leave a review, it will be highly appreciated.**


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